the same ~!~

and in the end
we are the same


all that bothered me the previous year
all the people you distanced yourself from
the one person you wrapped your life in
the disappearing act you pulled

i can sense myself heading down that road

a month ago ~!~

bring me back to the beginning of february
march just isn't cutting it for me

it's all slipping away

everything feels so distant
everyone

i'm losing myself
and everyone else

i know what i want ~!~

i can vision the life i dream of
the rickety beach dwelling
only feets away from the sea

alone

no tourists
only us
a house
on the shore

beautiful, temperate weather year round
running along the sand
through meadows
forests

not a care in the world
freedom

less insane~!~

nowadays i'm less insane
more in control
with stability
happiness
most days the week

boring

boring

that is what i am

no longer the adventurous spirit
venturing wide and far
to meet new people
encounter new surroundings

i have settled

but why?

upset over others doing the same
and i've fallen victim to the same

same room
same suite
same people every night
same party
same deal

nothing new
no change

something needs to be brought to the table

i cannot remain a state of constant familiarity for long
i need
long for
change